Thursday, December 13, 2007

Forbes has a sense of humor

Prince Peach made it to the Forbe's top 15 richest fictional character list this year. They explained it by saying she married Mario and then divorced him, taking off with half of the fortune in shiny gold coins and mushrooms. Tsk tsk... I guess even fairy tales need legal help these days.

THere were also several other major changes on the list. I quote:

McDuck moves into the top slot vacated by last year's richest fictional character, defense contractor Oliver ''Daddy'' Warbucks. Warbucks was tragically killed by an improvised explosive device during a visit to Iraq in March. The mogul's sudden demise leaves Warbucks Industries--the world’s largest maker of depleted uranium artillery shells and cat food--without leadership. Adopted daughter Lil' Orphan Annie is now in court fighting Warbucks' former wives, bodyguards and mistresses for control of the company and estate.

All told, six billionaires fell off the list, including Atlantic City real estate magnate Mr. Monopoly, who lost everything in the subprime mortgage crash. Archaeologist Lara Croft is missing and presumed dead after her plane disappeared above the Congolese jungle. And narco-capitalist Tony Montana, aka Scarface, was finally confirmed dead by a joint CIA/FBI task force.

Taking their place is a cast of new characters including Ming the Merciless, who ranks second on this year's list. With the existence of this evil alien overlord only recently confirmed by the U.S. government, we've had difficulty separating planetary wealth from his personal fortune, but we can safely say his net worth is at least $20.9 billion, and potentially much higher. Variously described as "control freak," "micro-manager," "vile despot" or "a kinder Steve Ballmer," Ming is best known for his fixation on NASA public relations specialist Dale Arden, girlfriend of astronaut Flash Gordon.

I guess fortune is a rather fickle thing.


Velius said...

Prince Peach....This report is obviously not telling us about "her" secret other life. I never knew she became a MAN!!!!!??

Tochi said...

Yeah, I was quite puzzled when I read "Prince Peach". Thanks for clearing that up, Vel!

moonfleck said...

ah well, I can't find the edit button so I am leaving it! :D